Prince Edward Sues Sourly Mallory for Breach of Contract

Photos of the Royal Penis in Clear Violation of Confidentiality Agreement

 It was the piss seen all around the world. By now, everyone is familiar with the recently-surfaced photos of Prince Edward standing on the deck of a yacht, penis in hand. The complaint filed by His Royal Highness asserts that those photos were taken by none other Lauren Mallory, his former flame, and that their subsequent leak was a direct violation of the Non-Disclosure Agreement she signed prior to becoming his girlfriend. (That’s right—the word ‘leak’ is used to describe what happened to photos of Prince Edward, well, taking a leak. We couldn’t stop giggling, either.)

It’s expected they’ll come to an out-of-court settlement, with any awarded damages being donated to charities dedicated to helping penises less fortunate.


5 thoughts on “Prince Edward Sues Sourly Mallory for Breach of Contract

  1. Paybacks are a bitch. NDA or not, he should have known she’d be out for blood. I mean, come on. He had his BODYGUARD dump her for him, for piss sake.

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